About Dr. Tom

Dr. Tom was born on the Fifth of July, which he uses to celebrate every night after work, and sometimes during.

He has been married for over thirty years, the last six to the current Mrs. Dr. Tom. The first three Mrs. Dr. Tom's all endorsed his election to United States Senate as they may now receive back support payments and the restraining orders can be lifted. The current Mrs. Dr. Tom is participating in a long-term project at an out-of-state facility run by the former First Lady, Mrs. Betty Ford.

He has two grown children that he hopes will eventually become adults. His son, Dr Tom, Jr. is also in public service working for the Tennessee Department of Corrections assisting in roadside beautification projects while his daughter, Whippet, is employed as a personal assistant to the bass player, drummer and two roadies of the mega Heavy Metal band Hard Leather Ball Breakers.

Dr. Tom has served in the medical profession since his graduation from the St. Alphonso Medical and Barber College of Greater Aruba, West Indies in 1979. He has successfully completed both suspensions and required counseling and again has had his full privileges to practice medicine and write prescriptions restored.

Dr. Tom currently resides at the El Grande Mucho Mobile Home Village as the last three Mrs. Dr. Toms occupy every dream home he has ever purchased. However he hopes to soon move to a now vacant yacht, The Duke-Stir, at anchor in the Potomac Basin.